A guy was walking down the high street past the pet shop when the owner called him in to see the latest new pet sensation. "It's a talking centipede" he said, "only £20". The guy wasn't really in the market for a new pet, but on the other hand a talking centipede sounded cool, so finally he bought one, plus its tank, food and toys, for £30. He got home and set it up on the bookshelf. At first he just watched it scuttle around, buy after a while this got boring so he decided to make it talk. "Hey mate - fancy going out for a pint?" He waited, but there wasn't a sound. He got more and more angry at the way he'd been conned out of his £30. Eventually he'd had enough - he deiced to give it one more chance before he took it all back to the pet shop to get his £30 back. So he shouted: "HEY MATE - FANCY GOING OUT FOR A PINT??!!" Then he heard a small voice saying "OK, OK, I heard you the first time!. Give me half a chance - I'm just putting my shoes on...