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Stuff off nightmares !! WARNING!!


BIKERDAD
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Just been reading a news story (not sure why its news ??) In the sun .

About a bloke in the USA who seen a squiral on his fence and it looked like it was stuck so he went to have a.look and was right it was stuck . .......... his fence panels went left to right with a small gap between . The squiral had ..... its bollocks caught between the fence panals the guy filmed the squiral trying to pull his nuts thro the fence but they are too big it only had to go back the way it came as it was about an inch across .the squiral was turning left an right trying to get free . OMG it look sore ...

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Squirrels (tree rats) is seriously bad news.....back in the dim and distant, a mate of mine was out for a Sunday afternoon drive with his Mrs. and daughter, in the lush middlesex countryside......zipping down a side road, squirry the squirrel got a bit too close to the oncoming car and........thump! For some unknown reason, my mate stopped (yes, I know), squirry was writhing about in the gutter and daughter said tearfully....."dad, it's still alive......can't we take it to the vets" (yes, I know) so my mate went to pick little squirry up (yes, I know), and.....CHOMP!


The little fu*ker had clamped it's jaws firmly around his index finger and would not let go.......as you may be aware, squirrels have VERY sharp teeth....did I say it wouldn't let go? After the judicious application of a jack handle, squirry was persuaded to release my mate's finger and a laugh-a-minute trip to A&E at the North Middlesex duly followed. The bloody thing had bitten right through the tendon in my mate's finger and reconstructive surgery and several months in plaster and sling was the result.


And to add insult to injury, it wasn't even a red tree-rat but a grey one. At least it kept the lads in the office amused......

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Squirrels (tree rats) is seriously bad news.....back in the dim and distant, a mate of mine was out for a Sunday afternoon drive with his Mrs. and daughter, in the lush middlesex countryside......zipping down a side road, squirry the squirrel got a bit too close to the oncoming car and........thump! For some unknown reason, my mate stopped (yes, I know), squirry was writhing about in the gutter and daughter said tearfully....."dad, it's still alive......can't we take it to the vets" (yes, I know) so my mate went to pick little squirry up (yes, I know), and.....CHOMP!


The little fu*ker had clamped it's jaws firmly around his index finger and would not let go.......as you may be aware, squirrels have VERY sharp teeth....did I say it wouldn't let go? After the judicious application of a jack handle, squirry was persuaded to release my mate's finger and a laugh-a-minute trip to A&E at the North Middlesex duly followed. The bloody thing had bitten right through the tendon in my mate's finger and reconstructive surgery and several months in plaster and sling was the result.


And to add insult to injury, it wasn't even a red tree-rat but a grey one. At least it kept the lads in the office amused......

 

Lol this almost exact story happened at my work c1992. The lad hit a squirrel driving his Escort van and walked back to see if it was OK, it looked dead but when he picked it up it sunk it's teeth into him :lol: the injury wasn't as bad, but from then on he was called Squirrel :mrgreen:

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When I lived in London I got visited by a friendly squirrel one day, at first it was quite cute it just trotted into living room through open patio doors (was warm) and sat on coffee table so I gave it a chocolate biscuit which it sat there eating...


Big mistake... It then decided to come and be friendly and started running over me, their claws are fooking sharp! So in the end I put it back out into garden and closed door, it promptly ran up drain pipe and hopped across to open upstairs window and came back in :o


For weeks after if any door or window was open this squirrel would come trotting in looking for biscuits ripping my skin apart in the process.

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I've nearly had a squirrel under my bicycle wheels a few times, worst was the one I actually ran over whilst doing 30mph downhill (I did see it run away as I looked over my shoulder). Was lucky to stay upright - the problem is they panic and start dashing back and forth rather than just get out of the way, so if you try and swerve around them you'll probably just hit them anyway. Not good if they go into your wheel and stop at your forks. If a sudden stop of the wheel isn't bad enough, there's enough pictures out there of them actually shearing the forks....


Luckily the worst squirrel injury I have got so far was when my dog spotted one up a tree before I did and he attempted to give chase. Unfortunately for me he was on a lead and 30 odd kilos of dog suddenly yanked my arm sideways.... Stupid dog, the squirrel was already up the tree so unless he suddenly learnt to climb it he was never going to get it anyway.

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Back in 2012 I had a squirrel try to knock me off my GSXR!!


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I ran over a dead fox once (freshly culled so it wasn't in any way flattened) on an er6 at 80mph. Poor OBS and no streetlights. I saw it just before I hit it and just grabbed the throttle to try and lighten the front. Surprisingly it was a total non even apart from a massive crack which must have been bones as the bike wasn't damaged.


As for squirrels, I used to shoot them when I had my air rifle as they were doing a lot of damage to the in laws house. There seemed to be a never ending supply of them. Horrid things.

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Once ran over a squirrel in the car, girl friend at the time insisted I stopped and checked, which I did.

Had a massive row when I got back in the car - apparently when I opened the boot she thought I was getting a cloth out to wrap it up and take it to the vet - she didn’t realise I was taking out the jack handle to put it out of its misery😖


She put me out of my misery by sacking me the next day.

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The wide is forever hitting things in her car. The last one was a deer that would have made tasty dinner if she'd bothered stopping to scoop it up. :roll:

 

By law you can't pick up any animals you have hit for food. Only a following car can....

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The wide is forever hitting things in her car. The last one was a deer that would have made tasty dinner if she'd bothered stopping to scoop it up. :roll:

 

By law you can't pick up any animals you have hit for food. Only a following car can....

 

Why would you want to eat somthing you or the next car has run over .. :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :fart: :puke: :puke:

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do you call her that to her face? :shock:

 

:lol:

Why would you want to eat somthing you or the next car has run over .
I didn't say run over... I reckon stuff would be alright if it bounced off the bonnet.
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I killed Bambi on the military road between Coulport and Helensburgh.

Been on holiday and was leaving early hours to miss the traffic.

Bambi hurdled the Armco at the side of the road right into the front of the car.

Luckily Bambi was dead ( not sure what I would have done if it was twitching )

Kids and current Mrs Mickly were in the car so absolutely no chance of chucking it in the boot to sort out later.

It wrecked the front LH side of the car.

Had to pull the wheel arch off the tyre and use some boot laces to tie the bumper and headlamp inplace ( indicator was bollox’d)

Drove very slowly until finding a petrol station open in Dumbarton - purchased some gaffer tape and effected a repair that lasted the journey back to Cov at 70mph.

Bloody menace locally apparently -Bambi not me

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The wide is forever hitting things in her car. The last one was a deer that would have made tasty dinner if she'd bothered stopping to scoop it up. :roll:

 

By law you can't pick up any animals you have hit for food. Only a following car can....

 

I can't help but wonder how you come to have that particular bit of the legal system to hand.

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The wide is forever hitting things in her car. The last one was a deer that would have made tasty dinner if she'd bothered stopping to scoop it up. :roll:

 

By law you can't pick up any animals you have hit for food. Only a following car can....

 

I can't help but wonder how you come to have that particular bit of the legal system to hand.

 

Growing up in the countryside you end up in a lot of vehicles that hit animals. And I was taught to cook from a fairly young age so had a fairly good understanding of where food came from or could come from.

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By law you can't pick up any animals you have hit for food. Only a following car can....

 

I can't help but wonder how you come to have that particular bit of the legal system to hand.

 

Growing up in the countryside you end up in a lot of vehicles that hit animals. And I was taught to cook from a fairly young age so had a fairly good understanding of where food came from or could come from.

 

I grew up in the new forest and I've heard this said to be law too.

Think the idea is that it prevents people deliberatly running creatures over for food.

Mate of mine had a classic mini and found a dead dear so he strapped it to the bonnet. Drove home with his head out of the window as he couldn't see a thing through the windshield!!

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