MarkW

Cut the brake lines and hand it back to her. Both problems solved!

Electric is the way to go. At least that would be a physical challenge with some purpose and a clear objective, which is what I enjoy. Years ago I had a student job at Michelin, chucking lorry tyres on the back of wagons. That kept me pretty fit! I also helped a friend rebuild his extension and re-do the floor, and moving bricks and concrete from here to there for a week was knackering but satisfying when you could see what had been achieved at the end of it. I just can't muster that level of enthusiasm for lifting weights in the gym. Perhaps I should cancel my gym membership and look for some local volunteer work digging old biddy's gardens or something. Hmm... worth a thought...

Who me? Hmm... not sure to be honest - I could when I was training regularly, but that was well over 10 years ago now. I suspect the muscle to weight (i.e. cake) ratio has changed somewhat since then! I can put a Rowntrees Fruit Pastille in my mouth without chewing it though, if that counts for anything...

Funny you should mention that! We've been thinking about kayaking - my wife and I have both done it, and our eldest had his first taste of it on an outward bound course last year and loved it. I was looking at the 125 mile Devizes to Westminster race the other day. It takes up to 4 days, although I think the record was something like 15 hours. My only concern is that I don't think I'd be able to resist the temptation of taking my fly rod along, in which case I'd never finish it! Another slight irritation is that when I approached our local kayaking clubs they said we'd have to do a beginners course first, and that they only take new people in September so that they've completed the pool training and are ready to do their open water assessments about now. Bugger! Not given up on it though...

Evening all. After several abortive attempts at sticking to a routine at the gym over the last 15 years I have come to the conclusion that I need some sort of physical challenge to motivate me - something in the diary that I can't back out of and that I need to train for diligently. A few years ago I half contemplated having a crack at swimming the Channel, but quickly came to the realisation that what actually appealed to me about it was being covered in lard. One of my friends does Ironman competitions, and although they'd make the ultimate physical challenge I couldn't do them even if I could get fit enough, for two reasons: 1. I can't run for more than about 25 minutes. 20 years of karate - much of it on unsprung wooden floors - has left me with two knackered knees. The left one is particularly bad, to the point that just climbing stairs can be uncomfortable at times. 2. The sheer boredom of a two-and-a-half mile swim followed by a 112 mile bike ride and then a marathon would kill me. You get 16 hours to complete it - can you imagine that? 16 hours of mind-numbing tedium. No thanks. So, I need some suggestions for something I could do that doesn't involve running but that would require great physical fitness. Not something boring and wankerish like the f*cking Tour de Yorkshire, something more obscure: competitive dwarf throwing or bear wrestling would be more the thing I'm looking for. Over to you...

My instructor used to say "Assume other motorists have seen you, and are actively trying to kill you."

I don't know what's wrong with [mention]Six30[/mention] at the moment: someone mentioned pulled pork in the cooking thread and he didn't say a word.

I'd love a Landcruiser, but the only ones I can afford are so ancient they've got cassette players!

I trust that's Fortnum and Mason's own brand luxury spam.

Looks like a bit of a rolling road block . Wait 'til you see it with me on...

I know I got rid of my Harley last year, but there's something about that massive V-twin that gets under your skin. I'd love a new Fat Boy - I took one for a spin before getting the Electra Glide and it was a complete blast!

I've got two of them... What about this though. Super cool, surely?

This isn't one of his, is it?

My old bike had the left indicator switch on the left grip and the right switch on the right grip. They were self-cancelling, which took a bit of getting used to, but the one on the right grip was exactly the same as the kill switch just above it. Much excitement when changing lanes on a busy German roundabout in rush-hour...

Here's mine: it's 2mm across and I got it done in 1978 when the boy sitting next to me at school stabbed me in the leg with a fountain pen.

Check! Hmm.. good question. Or, if the ladder is a structural support and has to be left in place, what happens when someone pulls into the spot next to you late at night and knocks it out from under you whilst you're asleep?

I have just been standing outside with a cup of tea, contemplating the extreme shitness of my old XC90. It looks as though it has rolled down a mountain (but not on its wheels) and I've been wondering what to do with it for some time: part-exchange it for something better, run it into the ground and throw it away, or just burn it for the insurance money. Then it came to me in a blinding flash: let's turn it into an off-road armchair with a roof tent! Oh yes - this we can do. I shall start scouring Ebay at once for bits to stick on it to effect this miracle transformation. I'll get some chunky all-terrain tyres, lots of superfluous lights, and one of those folding shovel things. My only slight concern is that the XC90 is not exactly renowned for its off-road capabilities: I drove it over a twig once, which immediately lodged itself between the front brake disk and the dust shield and made a squealing noise that had small children clinging onto their mothers as I drove home through genteel Yorkshire villages. I'd better get myself a winch too. You never know when one of those might come in handy...

I've just seen a young woman with a huge tattoo of her father's face on her chest with a banner saying 'Dad' underneath it, and the same thing on her back. Imagine that: no matter how you tackled things you'd find yourself staring at your father-in-law. More than a little off-putting, I'd have thought.

That's the one we saw - in the air and then in its new home. Such a shame they won't fly any more. I may have to become an eccentric millionaire and resurrect one, which seems like an appropriate sentiment on Easter Sunday...

A few years ago during one of my business trips to Kenya I was in the passenger seat of a Mercedes that hit a vulture one evening on a back road to Naivasha. It flew straight at us and was eviscerated by the badge sticking up on the bonnet before being spatchcocked on the windscreen. The mess and the smell were quite something.

I saw a Vulcan at the side of the road yesterday as I was driving into Norwich, together with a Lightning and a few other odds and ends. I might pop in tomorrow for a quick look around.

Actually, now I come to think about it my paternal grandfather worked for Westland in Yeovil during the war. He died when I was a baby and my old man kicked the bucket when I was a kid, so it's not something I ever got to find out much about. Perhaps a little research is called for...

Some very cool stuff on this thread! I think the most famous (or infamous) plane I've seen is the Enola Gay, which dropped the bomb on Hiroshima. It's in the Udvar-Hazy Centre in Virginia, which is one of my favourite places to visit when I'm in Washington DC.

I saw one of the last flights of the Vulcan over Elvington a couple of years ago. What a machine! One of the things that surprised me was how close it got before you could hear it - pretty much right over head, at which point it was deafening. There was something very unsettling about seeing something that big coming towards you with its bomb doors open: if you'd been on the Falkland Islands in the early 1980s you'd have had the distinct impression that nothing good was about to happen.

Cool! Where's that?