Bhawk

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None!

A young journalist had gone to work for the local newspaper. His first assignment was to write a brief human interest story. An idea came to him and he returned to one of the most remote areas he knew of in his home state. Deep in the woods, he came upon a farmer's house and decided this would be a good place to start. He introduced himself to the back country farmer. "I'm doing a human interest story and I'd like to interview you," the young journalist said. "Sure thing," the farmer replied. "Okay," the reporter began. "Tell me about an event in your life that made you very happy." The farmer replied, “One time a neighbor lost one of his sheep. We all formed a posse and found it. After we all screwed it, we took it back to the farmer that lost it!” “I can’t print that!” said the reporter, “Can you think of another event that made you happy?” The farmer thought for a minute and said, “Yep. One time the daughter of another local farmer got lost. She was a good-lookin’ young girl. We all formed a posse and found her. She was 18 and she was willing. After all of us screwed her, we took her back to her daddy.” "I can't print that either!" the journalist said. "Let's try something different. Tell me about a time in your life that made you really sad." The farmer hung his head and replied, “Well, I got lost once...”

Hey everyone when I bought my bike (Yamaha thundercat) I also splashed out and bought a bagster tank cover. Cost just over 100, it's a perfect fit and looks like decent leather, the only worry I have is how it will stand up once it's been wet which will inevitably happen at some point. But main reason I got it, was on my old bike I managed to scratch the tank, however little it was it really annoyed me, hopefully with the tank cover that can't happen now. It looks good on the bike too. So does anyone else have one, and if so, how did you find it, are they as good as I'm hoping? Any bad points to having one? Cheers

When i worked at the tip it was for may gurney, they paid the council millions for the contract, big money to be made in waste, what always got me was the green waste, you take your green waste to the tip, from there they take it to the nearest transfer station, where it is shredded and put into big piles to rot down, once composted its bagged up and sold back to the public at a high price, who then use it to grow stuff and so the cycle begins again. We once had to shut the site down as there was radioactive material in the metal container. Living near the military we once had about 15 large boxes of ration packs brought in, still in date. I pretty much lived of boil in the bag meals for months haha. After a while we were told we needed to recycle even more, which meant breaking open bags and sorting the waste, horrible work! Well i remember a little old lady coming in, chucking some bags on the machine, so i told her we need to sort it, she grumbled then got in her car and sped off, so doing my job i opened the first bag and it was full of dildo's, butt plugs etc! We also had someone from the military chuck some very large live ammunition into a several tonne compacter then drive off, luckily i saw it before i pressed the button! It is a very "interesting" line of work. They are told they are not aloud to sell or give anything away, but we often had people come in and give us bacon butties and the like in return for saving certain things back for them

Never made bunny burgers, makes an awesome curry though! Basically its chicken with flavour I have hunted deer with eagles before, i need to get some deer for the freezer, ive not had any in a while. So much free food to be had. One of the best things ive had is cajun squirrel, although i dont tend to hunt squirrels much, ive seen a squirrel bite the toe off a hawk before, you can get specially armour plated equipment for hunting squirrels. ill stick to my bunnies though

Didn't tesco have that idea with some extra horse they had walking around? Make use of what you have, as it is, horsies are tastey

Ferreting? Please explain for the ill educated! Also, I couldn't help but think of a man on a giant eagle when reading our post. Life must be great Ferreting is basically where i put a ferret in a rabbit warren, the rabbits run out to get away and get caught in purse nets ive laid over the holes so i can quickly dispatch them then take them home to eat. I make a lot of "rabbit nuggets" same as chicken nuggets but rabbit instead, my 4 year old son lives on them lol They also feed the birds, dogs, cats, me and a few friends too. I also donate some to a cafe that feeds the homeless. Nowt better than free, organic, free range food lol I wish there was an eagle big enough to fly on!

With a bit of maintenance my hyosung was by far the best bike I've had in my eyes. The build quality was fine, the only thing I wish I changed was the exhaust, the exhausts are cheap and do rot, but everything else was great. It was a small bike with the big bike feel to it. As for top speed, it's a 125, don't expect too much from it. I would definitely recommend this bike to anyone, it's a real head turner and decent ride!

Not really a joke but something that once happened. When I was younger I worked in a falconry centre, doing displays for the public. One day me and a colleague were stood by the vultures aviary, when I kids comes up to us and goes "whoaaaa their massive... would they eat me whole?" to which, without hesitation my colleague replies "no, they'll leave that bit" I was howling!

My great grandfather was a midget, I remember meeting him when I was very young. He used to make dolls houses for the kids, it's only recently I realised the humour of a little man making even littler houses for little kids lol

Hey everyone, a few years back i had a second job, working at the local tip. The amount of times we had bikers throwing all their gear out when they packed up. So i used to claim them, and thanks to this i managed to get 2 sets of leather trousers, 1 fabric trousers, 1 leather jacket, 1 fabric jacket, 2 pairs of boots and one one piece leather suit and three pairs of gloves. All the equipment is in near perfect condition, i only took the ones that fit me, i saw more thrown out! While i may not have stylish fashionable gear, i got it for nothing! So lesson is, if you are skint, always ask at the local tip, theyd happily put anything aside for you. And you never know whats going to turn up!

My gamertag is ifalconer v i think, if ever im on im normally on black ops, however if it says im playing elder scrolls, then its my lass thats on...she plays on the xbox more than me!

I have been vaping a long time now, i used to smoke 40 a day, to be completely honest, its nothing to do with health reasons or anything like that. Im a yorkshireman, im tight. Vaping is far cheaper than tobacco. As for what set up ive got i couldnt tell you, i just walked in pointed at one and said "ill have that"

I get paid to fly birds of prey, i also use my ferrets to go ferreting, i do some shooting and im still half way through learning to paraglide. All in all, life is pretty good, just need to sort out my DAS then i can get my bike on the road