XmisterIS

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/place/512 ... ee60b72a17

Today I had a good blast to bournemouth from southampton, and NOTD goes to the weekend warrior riding an R1 like an organ donor. He overtook me as i hung back behind an hgv as we were approaching a busy junction, then he overtook the hgv through the junction, then overtook a van up ahead on a blind bend with a double solid white line. Now, I like to "make progress", but there's a time and place ...

Good luck! Just remember, all you have to do is ride round for 40 minutes doing what the examiner tells you. Then burn those L-plates! It's a great feeling

NOTD is the ar*ehole in the BMW (yes, he fitted the stereotype) who didn't like me filtering in front of him at the head of a queue of traffic at a red traffic light. Beeping at me, shouting insults out of the window, flashing his headlights at me. Naturally, I casually gave him the middle digit. When the lights changed he floored it to try and undertake me ... well, that did make me chuckle!

Just down the road from our house: http://www.sandyballs.co.uk

Mind you, the same could be said of my generation ...

It is a tired old joke ... a very flaccid, tired old joke ... but a joke nonetheless. Everybody needs a familiar old joke now and again ...

I have never posted any photos in this part of the forum because XmrsIS has her modesty to think of. Jus' sayin' ...

Why do they hold it in the middle of Feb, I wonder? I would have gone along if it didn't involve riding all the way to London and back in rain at 3 degrees celcius ...

I can't read the article because it wants me to sign up to do so, but XmrsIS regularly works with police/fire/etc as part of her job. She said that even when an emergency vehicle is on blues 'n' twos, they must follow the highway code when practicable and if they don't, then they are automatically held 100% responsible until proven otherwise. Sounds like a heck of a responsibility!

Taxi drivers tend not to give a shit either - unless the roles are reversed, of course, in which case they will go mental at you.

I find myself buying and selling less and less on EBay nowadays. As a buyer I find that people hide postage costs (as already said), and they can be tardy in dispatching goods. As a seller, I get complete morons asking f**king stupid questions. E.g. I have listed things as "Buyer Collects" and I've put in sodding huge red letters "Collection Only", and I STILL get some jackass asking me, "How much you post this Russia, I pay?"

I think he is a member of the fuzz. Jumping a red light and t-boning a police car. That's some going ...

What's with the sudden trend for wearing smart trousers too short? I see increasing numbers of young men going to work in very smart suits with the trouser cuffs up round their ankles. Back when I was a nipper in my first job, if a man wore too-short trousers to work, it was a sure sign that he still lived with his aged Mother and she did his clothes shopping for him ...

I seriously need to get back into cycling for my health! The trouble is, there's no contest between a 1/4 brake horsepower engine capable of 30mph (only just, when I'm fit, and not for long even then) and a 140bhp engine capable of warp factor 9!

Oh, now you've challenged me on my own territory! I am a cooking God (and modest too!) I do blow my own trumpet because it's one of the few things in very very good at. People ask me to cook if we're gong round to theirs for a meal! I don't mind, it's one of those things in life (aside from bikes) that i love. I shall dig through my recipes and find one that is completely my own creation, is not too difficult to make and which i know you will love! EDIT: Here's a quick one i know from memory, you will never buy tomato sauce in a jar again after cooking this! It is dead easy and quick to make. XmisterIS's tomato sauce: You will need a hand blender and a large lidded pan. That is all. Ingredients: 1 tin chopped tomatoes. 2 cloves garlic, peeled. 1 stick of celery, roughly chopped. 1 vegetable stock cube. 2 tablespoons red wine vinegar. 2 tablespoons olive oil. Method: Put all ingredients in the blender and blend until smooth. Transfer to the pan, bring to the boil, reduce heat to a simmer and put the lid on. Cook for at least 10 minutes, longer if you want the sauce thicker. Leave to cool when desired thickness has been reached. Keep it in the fridge, you can use it thin as a quick pasta sauce, or you can reduce it right down to a paste and use it on pizza bases, etc.

Gutting ... I'm in southampton too near Portswood, where was your bike taken from?

that reminds me - I need to set up my action camera mount in my car! Already done it on the bike ... makes it look like the Borg, or something!

It works the other way round too ... The word "mist" in German means "excrement". (e.g. Entschuldigung Sie bitte, wo darf ich den Mist machen? Doch, ich muss es ja bald! ... Zu spät. Es ist gekommt. Tut mir leid ...)

Best present - Kindle paperwhite from XmrsIS. Worst present - Pan protectors from XmotherIS. Oh, and: http://i443.photobucket.com/albums/qq157/Boozad_Bat/300px-KennethWilliams.jpg Oh, Matron!

You may thank me with motorcycle parts. A set of 4-2-2 Akrapovic headers will do nicely, thank you.

I did that with the car. I got the second letter, was incensed! (Incensed, I tell you, enraged, apoplectic). I was convinced they hadn't sent a first letter. I ranted to the wife about it for 5 minutes straight. Then I stomped off to the office to pay the thing online. I opened a drawer to get my credit card out and ... Oh ... there's the first letter ... I see. It would have been bloody stupid to get a huge fine for a car that only costs £30 per year to tax! (I drive a Ford Ka - also known as "the rollerskate", "the go-kart", and "crap").

Daily, it seems, my Mother manages to do something that leaves me speechless. Today she came round to help us with Christmas stuff, so I gave her a stack of Christmas cards and several sheets of address labels. "Put those addresses on those cards", I said. Five minutes later I went to see how she was getting on, expecting her to be pretty much done. She had done precisely three hand written addresses. "Oh, I'll need some help, it's going to take ages to write all these addresses it otherwise". "Labels. They're on labels. You peel the label off and sick it on the envelope". "I thought you might have wanted to save them for next year". "..." Merciful almighty God and the sweet baby Jesus, give me strength ...

If I'd seen that, I would have loudly said, "Would you like me to help while this guy just stands there like a spare part?" I have done things like that before. It's very satisfying to see certain people wishing the floor would swallow them up!