Mawsley

If "they" haven't sussed out by now that all my kitteh-hating messages are code to the rest of my cell then they never will. Dog will destroy all kittehs, dog is great. Plus, I really do hate kittehs.

We passed a jogger yesterday. I told my daughter, "if he'd set off earlier he wouldn't have had to run." [tm. Dadjoke] She didn't get it. My wife's genes are shit.

I'm betting it's half as much fun - unless you meant that in the 'crimping one off' sense, in which case a seventeenth as fun.

I am delighted to say that I have no idea what a "standing lat pull-down machine" is. I intend to continue this state of blissful ignorance.

Public Health England and the Royal College of Physicians state it is AT LEAST 95% safer than smoking. The Cochran Revue says this estimate is conservative. There's not a hope in flip that it's even in the same ballpark as smoking. The analogy is leaving a building: vaping has the dangers associated with climbing through a ground floor window, smoking is like jumping from the sixth floor. It's not safe, the safest thing to do is not take anything into your lungs, but it is (and I'll happily provide a ream of studies to support this) substantially safer. It works because it mimics smoking but also provides a hobby aspect. The likes of Konstantinos Farsalinos have postulated that it carries a fraction of the addictive quality of smoking too - and I can anecdotally support that. Big Pharma have done an excellent job of muddying the waters, don't believe the bullshit.

As did I. We just got back from the pub, that was tricky. Having a puff is part and parcel of having a pint. I didn't, I had some poncy pie where the peas had to go on top - it was like they were scared of the chips or something. Bloody noncey food.

I was chased by a cabbie waving a machete in Colombia. I'd insulted his mother but, in my defence, only because he'd called me a stupid American. Can't say I'm a machete fan.

Seven days no vape. I tried cutting down to 1.5mg then 0mg before, but it was awful and a failure. This time, a week ago, I decided I'd just jack it in. So much better, only twice have I wanted to have a vape and that moment passed quickly. There's no way nic is as addictive in vaping as it is in smoking.

I miss South America.

Dear Santa, For Xmas I would like the memory of Rant's image removed from my head. Thank you, L'il Mawsley.

I never do this because I have insurance, life is too short and if I'm arriving home it's because I'm cold/hungry/thirsty/horny. They are welcome to my bike while my face is buried in a pizza box. *Thats not a euphemism.

If short-fingered people don't like "seeking information from others" then why would they be consulting a palm reader in the first place?

Can't have too many chains and locks imo. I try to add a security device to the garage each time a new bike comes in; individually some might be suspect, together they are all mighty.

I know two people who got cams for their bikes in the last six months. They both decided they were now the new Bay/Spielberg/whoever. I've added video footage of bike rides to my Room 101 list.

Always concerns me, if somebody tries to break in, damages locks, how do you get in? Through the side, didn't you watch the instructional video above?

Hookers Cards for blackjack.

That's the strange thing ... punchy I aint. I think I was a little rattled and it came out Viagra Rage? Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough?

The system is so broken that the best we can ever hope for is a choice between the South Park douchebag and turd. Feeble-minded liberals like me thrash about looking for a makeshift, best fit solution - but it's all too evident that workable solutions to mighty problems simply aren't there. Corrupt to the left, corrupt to the right...I'm bereft of hope or ideas. Except voting me as benevolent dictator. I suggest everybody votes for me and hopes it doesn't go tits. *I am prepared to trade future favours for present likes. And by likes I mean votes. And by votes I mean death to my mortal enemies.

And did he appreciate it?

Err... no. Trump is the worst option because he is full of shit. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk He's honest about being full of shit.

Member when someone promised waffles?

Waffles? Where are the waffles?

Murica's new foreign policy...

https://youtu.be/WWXLlHyoJxQ https://youtu.be/ziNaZxvp-Qk

Cheaper than providing them with adequate mental health provision and secure accommodation.