Joeman

Big question is, which bunch of incompetent morons supplied a motorbike numberplate with self tapping screws??

I snapped a screwdriver bit whilst using my impact driver (I know, I shouldn't have done that) They swapped if for a new one no questions asked.

Anyone in the Southampton area want any floor tiles, glass table, or pushchair/carseat? Need them gone asap so silly money takes them away. 4x boxes of grey ceramic floor tiles. 1.44m per box 3x glass tables in various sizes. 1x pram/carseat/travel system in good condition.. Located in central Southampton, collection only.

Probably you that was going round he roundabout with the wrong indicator going then.

Ouch. Is that a standard finish for you or OT? 7am to 5:30 is pretty normal. Today I was in at 8am. had a problem come up at 5pm just as we were planning a cheeky pint. Had to stay and fix it. Updates to a production database late on a Friday night are always exciting.. one mistake and the systems crashes. So will connect in from home tonight to check all is good and monitor emails over the weekend. Back in 7am Monday. Its bonus season so it's good to out in the extra time

The machines are replicating... Be afraid!!

Only just left the office..

That's where I saw you then on the Kent firebike course at brands hatch! A fantastic course that was.. Welcome to the forum

I electrocuted my deputy head in sixth form. I took a disposable camera apart and made a crude stun gun. I also wrapped it in wires so when you threw it at someone and said "hey catch" they would get a shock.. The deputy head caught me doing it (due to loud swearing screams in the corridor) and demanded I hand it over to him. I tried to explain, but he just wouldn't listen. Eventually he said "ok, well take the battery out and hand it to me..." Again I tried to explain that the huge capacitor was still charged up and taking the battery out made no difference, but he thought I was lying. So I took the battery out and handed him the device, and just waited.... I have honestly never seen a grown man react like he did as he took a massive shock to the hand, did some wierd dance and dropped the camera with a whole load of sixth form lads in hysterics at him... I was in a bit of trouble for that .. lol

Would make a great starting point for an Evel knievel helmet!

When I was 16 I got sent home from school for taking an open can of coke into the school office to drop something off. Deputy head told me to put it in the bin, I said "but it's full, it will make a mess" he shouted "bin it" so I held it over the bin, turned it upside down and poured the coke into the bin before dropping the empty can. Obviously he went mental and sent me home. So i didnt go home I went back to class. He came in, saw me there and shouted at me to go home. I said I thought he was joking which put him into a rage. Apparently he didn't joke.. lol So as I was leaving, one of my mates said "Joe, can you stop off at the bike shop and buy me a new headlight bulb?" To which I replied "yeah no worries I've got the day off so I'm going for a ride anyway" Well this just made the deputy head even more angry and he yelled "youve not got a day off to go riding, you're being sent home"... Then he just bellowed some more and I left sniggering... I pulled a wheelie across the school playground on the way out on my DT50MX and went straight to the bike shop to buy my mate a lightbulb. Happy days... Deputy head hated me as he tought me AS maths and I kept asking stupid questions. I also hacked his computer network and left a message saying "Joe woz ere" where I knew he would find it..

Start the kids too young in the UK too. They don't get a chance to be children because they are forced into the education system at an early age so that parents can get back to generating tax revenue.

Exactly. I had red pen all over my school books teachers used to throw our homework back at us if it was bad. Wooden blackboard rubber was thrown at our heads if we weren't paying attention. That's proper schooling. Not this political correctness bullsh1t that they seem to teach these days. Its no wonder the kids have no respect for teachers or discipline when they can basically do what they like and not get and negative response. And this follows into later life where they have zero ability to deal with failure or rejection. And these are the future adults who will be runing the country and paying our pensions... Thank f#ck they will all be replaced by robots as I don't trust any of them to be able to wipe their own arse without getting emotional for the feelings of the toilet paper, or worrying that the cardboard tube in the middle might feel lonely...

The expensive alternative to a rubber band is one of these. https://rover.ebay.com/rover/0/0/0?mpre=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.ebay.co.uk%2Fulk%2Fitm%2F351732585145

tip over sensor will cut the bike Hi Stu.... AFAIK... I've only ever had one bike with a tip over sensor.......please remember I'm an old git..... So bit of string tied to the rubber band and the other to your jacket. As you fall off the string will pull the band, the band will snap and the throttle close. Genius idea.

Wrap it around the brake lever pivot, not the actual lever its self. To activate cruise control slip the other end over the twist grip. To deactivate cruise control slip it over the switch gear. Oldschool but works. So what happens if you fall off? I know I had this conversation regarding the original device, but could the rubber band hold the throttle open in an "inappropriate" situation? Don't fall off... Simples...

Wrap it around the brake lever pivot, not the actual lever its self. To activate cruise control slip the other end over the twist grip. To deactivate cruise control slip it over the switch gear. Oldschool but works.

You just need a big rubber band between you throttle and brake lever (not pulling the lever obviously)

17 year old female who needs warming up?? [mention]Six30[/mention] will be along soon to offer his services...

Its an old jacket. If it was mine I'd have a go at sewing a new zip myself. How hard can it be?? The holes in the leather will already be there, just need to poke a needle through...

http://www.grip-puppy.co.uk/

heres an interesting discussion on the subject... https://police.community/topic/362-picking-up-roadkill/ so might be part of the Theft act:

I can't help but wonder how you come to have that particular bit of the legal system to hand. Growing up in the countryside you end up in a lot of vehicles that hit animals. And I was taught to cook from a fairly young age so had a fairly good understanding of where food came from or could come from. I grew up in the new forest and I've heard this said to be law too. Think the idea is that it prevents people deliberatly running creatures over for food. Mate of mine had a classic mini and found a dead dear so he strapped it to the bonnet. Drove home with his head out of the window as he couldn't see a thing through the windshield!!

Back in 2012 I had a squirrel try to knock me off my GSXR!! ">