Smokin Joe

Dont blame the breed, blame the owners... Rottweilers make fantastic, loyal pets.. the press would have us all think otherwise.. Dont believe me, come and meet my rescue rottie - hes the softest gentlest dog you will ever meet.. I've heard that before. The thing is that while your dog might be the softest, gentlest thing round you and your family the dogs natural instinct will be to protect it's pack leader (You). Now dogs are not the cleverest of animals, despite what many owners claim, and what are just innocent body movements by strangers can be misinterpreted by the dog who will attack - and dogs like Rottweilers are powerful enough to maim or kill. No offence to you, but not a breed I would have as a family pet.

Did it damage your biro?

At least your biro's ok.

My biro ran out of ink while I was doodling.

Hard to tell with tyre damage, you can get all sorts of cuts depending on what it is you rode over. Surely if someone did it deliberately they'd have gone right through?

If you take that view you'd never strike back at any terrorists. Over time the Israelis took out virtually everyone involved in the Munich massacre, only their own families remember their names.

I'd like to see these two sentenced to six months jail..... ...In a military prison.

I always stop at pedestrian crossings if a young lady with large breasts and a short skirt is waiting to cross.

Police cars on emergency calls do not have to show flashing lights or sirens, there may be occasions when a silent approach is called for. More likely they were just late for tea though.

I have a GPZ500, the glass does cloud up with condensation. A good run long enough to get the engine hot should clear it. I can't answer specifically about your bike, but these engines do tend to clatter quite noticeably at tick-over and low revs.

Re the dipstick, there isn't one. You have a sight glass on the R/H side of the engine through which you can see the oil.

Eight years after getting divorced I discovered by chance that my ex wife had died the previous year after becoming anorexic to the point her body shut down. She was only 37. It was an awful shock and I was terribly upset for a long while afterwards and still feel sad when I think about it now, sixteen years later. No matter what the time gap, when you learn of the death of someone who was once an intimate part of your life it is never easy.

I think the clue was when he said his chain was rubbing against the centre stand...

Radios are less distracting than phones. Radio messages are mostly passed between people in a professional capacity, are brief and to the point using the phonetic alphabet where necessary for clarity and to avoid having to repeat instructions. Chatting with your partner on a mobile while they hum and haw, switch from one subject to another, argue with you or tell you about the seeing to your going to get tonight is rather a different matter. If you want to have a phone conversation in a car pull over and stop. There are 24 hours in a day, you can surely spare the time.

Raise the fine to £500 and call it a Stupidity Tax.

If it was only a few weeks ago the garage fitted the tyre they are responsible for the chain being so slack. It wouldn't stretch that much in too weeks. The only visit I would ever make to that garage again is to complain about their incompetence. I would never trust them with my bike.

Buy a screw extractor kit - around a fiver on ebay - and get them out yourself. I've just done that with two cross head screws where the previous owner had mashed the heads. If the threads need cleaning, a set of taps can be had for 7 or 8 quid. They're worth buying because that sort of kit isn't used much but can get you out of a jam.

What makes people think life in prison is cushy? I came very close once, and believe me when you've been through the process of police stations and courts and you see the type of person who'd make up your new neighbours you would not want to go there. Prison might be ok for the no-hopers who grow up on sink estates where life is probably no better and often worse than it is inside, but for any normal person it would be hell. I wouldn't like to be sentenced to five years in the Ritz if it meant I could never walk out the front door while I was there.

I've just put one out. It's a lonely life being a smoker these days.

I was about to have a foam at the mouth rant about the idiots who use mobile phones while driving but then I remembered the day a young lady obliged me while I drove down the M11 so I thought I'd better not.

Try Kenya, Bangladesh, Columbia, Vietnam or any of the countries who house the more than half the world's population whose day is spent trying to survive till the next one and you'll appreciate the soft. luxurious lifestyle even the most hard done by in this country live. There are far more below us on the ladder than there are above.

? It's due to rise in a few years time, but I'm certain my retirement age is still 65 and that isn't till 2017. Mrs SJ has been hammered though, she is a year younger hers goes up to 67 because she just missed the cut off deadline. It makes sense to raise the age as we are living longer and staying healthier. When the pension was first introduced in 1908 it was only awarded to those over seventy and was means tested. Only about 70,000 people qualified and few lived very long after that age so it was no drain on the state, unlike today where there are millions of pensioners and a smaller proportionate working population. i From an employers point of view t also makes sense to raise the age in that older people are more reliable employees than the young.

Not if you trade them in for a younger model before it happens... (Runs and hides) That's an appallingly sexist and offensive thing to say. All you need to do to keep them slim and fit is buy the heaviest hoover you can and trade the Flymo in for a push along mower. Exercise keeps the body trim and if you forbid the use of a roller and make sure they paint the ceiling with a brush it helps the muscles stay supple.

The bodies may go a little to seed, but for a really raunchy time you can't beat a bit of mature action. Older women like to talk dirty in bed.

Can't you use a cable tie to loop it against something and out of the way?