Mawsley

There’s a map to help with next year @Hoggs

Morning. That’s it, it isn’t ‘good’. I subscribe to an email from a news group, one of many. Woke up and almost dropped my coffee as I read about a person my age. He was described as, and I quote, “elderly”. HE’S NOT ELDERLY, HE’S THE SAME AGE AS ME, YOU TOSSERS. I unsubscribed in a fit of pique. I plan on spending the day doing youthful things such as forgetting my punctuation chatting shit and death by masturbation

I think we're having fun, I know I am. I've treated myself to a mini bag of BBQ Hula Hoops as an additional reward for winning. Thanks for the awesome hand-drawn graphic, Hoggz.

Better luck next year when the misspelling - and therefore absolute negation - of the word Billions might not cost you dearly. But I am nothing if not humble and magnanimous in glorious victory. Here, have a picture of an expired match voucher. Like Kettering, you were awarded second place in a two horse race.

Some kind of anti-vicar, probably.

Unaccustomed as I am to making public speeches, I shall be delivering this year's acceptance of TMBF's most ultimate of prizes in the form of a mixed media project on display in the entombed cellar under what used to be No.6 George Yard in Whitechapel. While I understand that some of you will be reluctant to break, enter and defile the floor of the soulless building that now occupies the site, I encourage you to make the effort - the period in jail will be worth the spectacle.

More like as not I'll be working. Sunday is my busiest of the week.

Got this one spayed this week. She’s still sulking.

Not a dog issue, that’s an “almost all people are cvnts” issue. Everyone is so damn lazy, self-centred and entitled these days. If I see we’re going to meet anyone while out walking I always pop my pair on leads - and they’re lovely and respond to command. But no one knows that. Given where we live it’s a rarity we ever see anyone. Brother lives in Nottingham. Never puts his whateverpoo on a lead. Really riles me up that does.

A group of us meet for Saturday breakfast - we were our region’s MAG, I’d been a member since the 80s - then area and region rep. It was a hive of community. Now look at the meets and socials page - regions where just one name is listed to make out it exists but no meets or events. It’s really sad how that bloke destroyed everything.

Fairings hide a multiple of sins though, eh. As do advert photos. And it’d be a very brave person to buy one of those with 23k on the clock given that the predicted lifespan of a CF engine is 20k. And then there’s aftercare and spares - simple things like keys and emails - video below While I don’t doubt they’re likely to dominate the leccy market, I’ll not be buying one. Their culture doesn’t value the customer, the notion of customer service is alien, I’ve spent the last 14 years rubbing alongside it amazed and appalled at the lack of shit they give.

People railed against ‘japcrap’ from a point of pure hypocrisy though - the British metal they were riding was leaking and falling apart on them as they rode. Modern bikes have never been more reliable, whereas I’m yet to see a single decent Chinese bike that hasn’t collapsed to a pile of rust before two years are out or the company provide a decent parts and servicing back-up.

You can try Google? But since Liversidge treated it as his personal fiefdom loads of members left. Then he was eased out. Then he returned and most of those members remaining also left. MAG is a husk of the organisation it used to be. If you are going to contact anyone then the BMF is your only realistic option now…but they’d never support something like this.

Afternoon. One day I'll learn. My paperwork filing system is a big box on the floor. Anything and everything goes in there as I pretend I don't have to file my tax return until the 28th reminder from HMRC. Three days I've spent trawling through it and doing all the itemising. Finally submitted, so I've now got just over a month to pay my bill. Next year's box is coming along well.

I taught myself to play Ramones tracks just barring power chords. I really can’t play guitar Saw them five times - and it really wasn’t anywhere near enough.

Welcome to Ramones Friday; every song ever sung by Joey, DeeDee, Johnny and the rest are being played non-stop and really fvcking loudly.

Emails from the council confirm two days of salting has been done, so the bike absolutely isn’t getting de-SORNed yet. I was catching the train to the footy on Saturday so the wife can have the car and go see her Dad in hospital…but they want to charge me £68 for a trip that’s take an hourish by road. F that. I’m now going to be sharing a coach with old people who smell of stale urine and are flatulent. *Sorry, got that the wrong way around, they’ll be stuck on a coach with me.

I love anything that isn’t sweet.

Little nuts, nip it. Big nuts, one final grunty turn using something with a long lever. Not had anything fall off a bike since 1980. *Yes, my gear change lever fell off my Guzzi in the Netherlands - but that was the fault of Guzzi not using my surefire tightening method

The biggest miss was making it weigh and handle like an oil tanker. They should’ve made it lightweight.

I made the mistake of one computer once...and it died on me. Fortunately I had automatic cloud backup. I currently have two laptops, a desktop Mac and a desktop PC, an iPad with keyboard, and a Steam Deck with keyboard. All of it gets replaced across a three or four year lifespan for each device. Excessive? Probably, but I'm never going through the panic I had before again.

I'm a scientist - so of course I have my vaccinations. ...and have zero truck with anyone wibbling about risks or conspiracies.

I wear a single pair of pants until a magical voice calls me disgusting and sends me to shower. Clean clothes appear.