Mug shot

[raesewell]

I was given a job to do, and do it I will, bigger and better than ever. 

[James in Brum]

I would think that Father is more the origin and grandfather has only the one D. The internet says this about it. 
for what it is worth Rae, I think one of the most majestic things about the English language is who it changes and evolves. 
 

 

[S-Westerly]

Well I'm a grandpa not a grandad or granddad (looks Welsh to me). I used to be a gampa until they got all grown up at 6 yrs old.

[raesewell]

Ah well over the years I have been dandad, gran gran and I'm still waiting for my latest to start talking.

[James in Brum]

There really is something wonderful about how kids use words. My daughter used to pronounce thank you very much as

’shanksyouVehMutch’ all one word. 

[Slowlycatchymonkey]

@James in Brum me thinks thou doth project too much

[MarkW]

Don't take any shit from these f*cking swine, Rae.

 

I hope there is a particularly hot corner of Hell reserved for those who go through life inflicting 'should of' instead of 'should have' on us. The same applies to anyone who thinks 'S' is pronounced 'Sh' ('shtraight', 'shtrange', or as it's Christmas how about 'Chrishtian') or who pronounces Brexit 'Bregzit'. An eternity with Beelzebub and all his hellish instruments of torture is the least they deserve. 

[S-Westerly]

11 minutes ago, raesewell said:

Ah well over the years I have been dandad, gran gran and I'm still waiting for my latest to start talking.

My youngest has literally just arrived so a while to wait there. His big sister  is  possibly moving towards gampa but the only words she's really keen on are choc and bye-bye if you annoy her.

[S-Westerly]

Just now, MarkW said:

Don't take any shit from these f*cking swine, Rae.

 

I hope there is a particularly hot corner of Hell reserved for those who go through life inflicting 'should of' instead of 'should have' on us. The same applies to anyone who thinks 'S' is pronounced 'Sh' ('shtraight', 'shtrange', or as it's Christmas how about 'Chrishtian') or who pronounces Brexit 'Bregzit'. An eternity with Beelzebub and all his hellish instruments of torture is the least they deserve. 

As a northerner my pet peeve is folks having a barth instead of a bath and cutting the grarse instead of the grass. 

[TimR]

Demonstration of how f**ked up the english language is. 

 

The "gh" in "hiccough" is pronounced like "p"

 

The "ough" in "doughnut" is pronounced like "o"

 

The "phth" in "phthisis" is pronounced like "t"

 

The "eigh" in "neighbour" is pronounced like "a"

 

The "tte" in "gazette" is pronounced like "t"

 

The "eau" in "plateau" is pronounced like "o"

 

So Potato should be 

ghoughphtheightteeau

[MarkW]

57 minutes ago, S-Westerly said:

As a northerner my pet peeve is folks having a barth instead of a bath and cutting the grarse instead of the grass. 

My eldest came back from school with 'barth' a few years ago. My wife and I trained him out of that PDQ!

 

I think of myself as an honorary northerner because I live in Yorkshire, and I consider my mother to be a genuine northerner because she comes from Manchester. However, one of our Geordie staff refers to people from Manchester as 'soft southerners' and daren't say what she thinks of people from Stoke for fear of being slapped in the face with her P45.

 

Mind you, I don't think you'd ever know I was from Stoke if you heard me, thank God - it's one of the most retarded accents on the planet. Even people from Stoke don't think I'm from Stoke: "Y'onner from rind ear, mar mate" as they used to say when I worked with them. 

 

Believe it or not there was a 'professional' Elvis impersonator in Stoke, but I can't imagine what the hell that would have sounded like - f*cking hilarious is my guess... 

 

American Trilogy (Live in Madison Square Garden version):

 

Oh I wish I were,

In the lander cotton,

Ode times they onner forgotten,

Luke away, luke away, luke away, Dixieland.

 

Sing eat mar mate... forky nell, thar's on thar own son...

[S-Westerly]

My wife is from Northumberland and considers anyone from south of the Tees as a southerner and of dubious morals and as for Scots well i never. No surprise the rievers lasted so long.

 

[raesewell]

I have a friend who lives in Wick, to him almost everyone in the UK is a southerner.

[Slowlycatchymonkey]

I’ll never forget my first Elvis impersonator and it was only a couple of years or so ago. It’s proper West Country here and there was a tubby out of tune non looky likey booked for a 40th apparently because the birthday girl and her mates were proper fans of the guy. 
 

He started singing, it was hilariously bad and I properly spat my drink out and started choking on my own laughter. I was on my own in this. I tried to recover my terrible ingratitude with a small chortle and a giggle with my now unfriendly seating companion with a hahahaa that’s apparently Elvis, brilliant he can’t even sing. He said “that’s my brother” I assumed it was a witty response and laughed even more. 
Apparently not it really was his brother

[rennie]

I don't know anything about Elvis impersonators!

 

There's 1 round here called yamyam Elvis! does it with a black country accent! People love him! 

[Slowlycatchymonkey]

The whole Elvis impersonator thing makes me laugh. Then again wot do I know when JXL released a remix of a little less conversation I thought “that’s clever but they need to tone down the Elvis impersonator, he’s waaay too OTT

[The GOAT]

From my daughter, cheeky little thing.

 

[Bender]

1 hour ago, S-Westerly said:

My wife is from Northumberland and considers anyone from south of the Tees as a southerner and of dubious morals and as for Scots well i never. No surprise the rievers lasted so long.

 

I would move that to south Shields. 

[Guest Richzx6r]

22 minutes ago, Bender said:

I would move that to south Shields. 

Nowt wrong with shields

[skyrider]

4 hours ago, raesewell said:

I didn't start this one. Just defending my honour.

smooth 

[skyrider]

and the present one is if someone goes into a shop they say can i get a meat pie instead of saying please can i have a meat pie 

[raesewell]

Or even, they go to the "store" to "get" a meat pie.

[skyrider]

1 minute ago, raesewell said:

Or even, they go to the "store" to "get" a meat pie.

well that's modern vocabulary for you 

[raesewell]

It's American infiltration of our English language.

[Slowlycatchymonkey]

Oh goddamn it we need a Raeswells Sesame Street teaches English thread