So...

[MarkW]

...let's fire up the W*nk-o-Meter and see what today scores:

This morning started with four of us on a conference call for two hours with an awkward client who wants us to repeat £56k of lab studies free of charge because they don't like the results. There is nothing wrong with the studies whatsoever, they just want us to show that their product performs better than it does. Much unhappiness when I refused.

Then an email from another client saying they don't require the £30k of studies we quoted for yesterday after all, as they have decided not to change the product specification.

Then confirmation from one of my colleagues that we haven't got the £250k project we tendered for, on the basis that the client thinks we're too small a company (22 people and counting) to handle US work. The fact that we have been successfully handling US work on behalf of all their competitors for over ten years apparently passed them by.

Mid-afternoon I got an email from a client who got right up my nose with his shitty attitude, and I was just composing one of my special email replies (toxicity level 7) when there was a massive bang like a bomb going off from one of the labs downstairs. I shot down there to find that an autoclave (basically an industrial pressure cooker) had exploded and blown the lid clean off the pressure vessel, ejecting molten agar and glass into the air. One of our lab staff, who had been standing next to it at the time, was curled on the floor, covering her face and screaming in agony, and I instantly went into full-on first-aid mode whilst an ambulance was summoned. Unfortunately the word 'explosion' seems to get emergency service despatchers quite excited, and the air ambulance was touching down on our car park in under five minutes with an ambulance and paramedic car close behind. Luckily she was suffering from little more than shock and an acute attack of mard-arse, and just had two tiny superficial blisters on her cheek. My wife accompanied her to hospital in the ambulance (no ride in the helicopter, unfortunately) and has just returned with confirmation that there's nothing wrong with her. She is somewhat accident prone though, having written off two cars in the three months she's been with us.

I now intend to drink an obscene quantity of pina colada, stick some cock rock on the iPod and beat the shit out of the drum kit.

[Arwen]

Wow that does sounds like a tough day! Drumming will certainly help I reckon, enjoy!

We have autoclaves at my work... They do seem to like blowing their tops off. We went through a spat of them blowing up and setting roof tiles on fire. Eventually there was procedures put in place that means there are only a limited number of people allowed to use them, and they undergo almost weekly maintenance checks.

[Bianco2564]

Holy crap, I thought I was having a bad day when I trapped my finger in a door.

Glad no one was seriously hurt

[raesewell]

Ha, I've had the grandchildren today, I'll swap ya

[Six30]

I wouldn't go near your drum kit today ... They'll self combust .

[MarkW]

I wouldn't go near your drum kit today ... They'll self combust .

 

With my playing that might be just as well!

[Joeman]

., stick some cock rock on the iPod and beat the shit out of the drum kit.

 

I'm so glad you got that round the right way... Too much information otherwise!!

[MR_W]

Makes my round trip from Bristol to Bodmin and back today seem like heaven.

[NeilM]

...let's fire up the W*nk-o-Meter and see what today scores:

This morning started with four of us on a conference call for two hours with an awkward client who wants us to repeat £56k of lab studies free of charge because they don't like the results. There is nothing wrong with the studies whatsoever, they just want us to show that their product performs better than it does. Much unhappiness when I refused.

Then an email from another client saying they don't require the £30k of studies we quoted for yesterday after all, as they have decided not to change the product specification.

Then confirmation from one of my colleagues that we haven't got the £250k project we tendered for, on the basis that the client thinks we're too small a company (22 people and counting) to handle US work. The fact that we have been successfully handling US work on behalf of all their competitors for over ten years apparently passed them by.

Mid-afternoon I got an email from a client who got right up my nose with his shitty attitude, and I was just composing one of my special email replies (toxicity level 7) when there was a massive bang like a bomb going off from one of the labs downstairs. I shot down there to find that an autoclave (basically an industrial pressure cooker) had exploded and blown the lid clean off the pressure vessel, ejecting molten agar and glass into the air. One of our lab staff, who had been standing next to it at the time, was curled on the floor, covering her face and screaming in agony, and I instantly went into full-on first-aid mode whilst an ambulance was summoned. Unfortunately the word 'explosion' seems to get emergency service despatchers quite excited, and the air ambulance was touching down on our car park in under five minutes with an ambulance and paramedic car close behind. Luckily she was suffering from little more than shock and an acute attack of mard-arse, and just had two tiny superficial blisters on her cheek. My wife accompanied her to hospital in the ambulance (no ride in the helicopter, unfortunately) and has just returned with confirmation that there's nothing wrong with her. She is somewhat accident prone though, having written off two cars in the three months she's been with us.

I now intend to drink an obscene quantity of pina colada, stick some cock rock on the iPod and beat the shit out of the drum kit.

Bet you are hoping she turns up in the morning.

RIDDOR time...

Don't envy you mate if HSE get involved.

[Slowlycatchymonkey]

He'll be dandy I detect the qualities of a cool killer- you don't get that far in business without it, thats a compliment BTW

Time first to release a little animal....

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[MarkW]

Bet you are hoping she turns up in the morning.

RIDDOR time...

Don't envy you mate if HSE get involved.

 

We get inspected fairly frequently due to the nature of the stuff we work with, but from what we can tell this was operator error: she manually disengaged the lid whilst the vessel was pressurised. The lid landed 20 feet away on the top of some 6-foot high racking: if it had hit her in the face it would have been a whole different story. The ambulance driver said they'd take her to A&E for a check, but they couldn't find anything wrong and thought she was just being a bit melodramatic. The hospital discharged her on the same basis and we told her to take tomorrow off.

She's a great worker, but seems very accident-prone. She wrote her car off on the way back from her interview 3 months ago, and then did the same to the replacement a few weeks later by slamming into the back of a queue of stationary traffic on the A1 exit slip.

[Bianco2564]

Thought there would be some safety device on the autoclave not allowing that to happen?

Not normally awake this time of day,just had to recover a drunken neighbour lying sparko in the middle of the street

[Slowlycatchymonkey]

Bet you are hoping she turns up in the morning.

RIDDOR time...

Don't envy you mate if HSE get involved.

 

We get inspected fairly frequently due to the nature of the stuff we work with, but from what we can tell this was operator error: she manually disengaged the lid whilst the vessel was pressurised. The lid landed 20 feet away on the top of some 6-foot high racking: if it had hit her in the face it would have been a whole different story. The ambulance driver said they'd take her to A&E for a check, but they couldn't find anything wrong and thought she was just being a bit melodramatic. The hospital discharged her on the same basis and we told her to take tomorrow off.

She's a great worker, but seems very accident-prone. She wrote her car off on the way back from her interview 3 months ago, and then did the same to the replacement a few weeks later by slamming into the back of a queue of stationary traffic on the A1 exit slip.

 

Could just all be coincidence but doesnt sound like the sort of person you want in a lab or necessarily someone whos going to add to your bottom line. On the other hand everyone deserves a chance and I bet she doesnt make the same mistake again. Hope you’ve not got them on a permanent contract yet?

[MarkW]

Thought there would be some safety device on the autoclave not allowing that to happen?

 

There is on all our big automatic lab units, none of which will open until they've completed their cycle, but this was a much older model with a completely manual closure that we were using for the purposes of an inter-laboratory validation - essentially running the clients internal protocol (which uses the old autoclave) alongside ours to show that the data were comparable.

What I don't understand is how she managed to open it before it had cooled down, because the pressure jams the lid tight shut. When the paramedic asked her what had happened she said she had seen the steam coming out of the pressure release valve but had thought it was safe to open ( ) and had cracked the handle, at which point it went bang.

According to my wife, who travelled to A&E with her in the ambulance, the paramedics could find nothing wrong except the two superficial blisters (combined area less than the size of a new 5p) on her cheek. When they asked her how bad the pain was on a scale of 0-10 she said 8, at which point they concluded that she was just being a drip.

[Mr Fro]

There is on all our big automatic lab units, none of which will open until they've completed their cycle, but this was a much older model with a completely manual closure that we were using for the purposes of an inter-laboratory validation - essentially running the clients internal protocol (which uses the old autoclave) alongside ours to show that the data were comparable.

What I don't understand is how she managed to open it before it had cooled down, because the pressure jams the lid tight shut. When the paramedic asked her what had happened she said she had seen the steam coming out of the pressure release valve but had thought it was safe to open ( ) and had cracked the handle, at which point it went bang.

According to my wife, who travelled to A&E with her in the ambulance, the paramedics could find nothing wrong except the two superficial blisters (combined area less than the size of a new 5p) on her cheek. When they asked her how bad the pain was on a scale of 0-10 she said 8, at which point they concluded that she was just being a drip.

 

What's your insurance like Mark?

If I were you I'd be checking she'd signed all the H&S stuff and made sure she couldn't possibly stick a claim in.

[MarkW]

What's your insurance like Mark?

If I were you I'd be checking she'd signed all the H&S stuff and made sure she couldn't possibly stick a claim in.

 

Cheers Fro! Our insurance is extensive, and we're hot on H&S paperwork due to the pathogens and nerve agents we have on site.

[Six30]

You get a women to do mans work and this is what happens Mark...

Just demote her and get her to make tea and generally tidy up and that...

[fastbob]

Cock Rock , is that a brand of Chinese Viagra or a popular tourist attraction ?

[Six30]

Ive Been there that's the Cock Rock Cottageing Park.

[Slowlycatchymonkey]

You get a women to do mans work and this is what happens Mark...

Just demote her and get her to make tea and generally tidy up and that...

 

WTF

[MarkW]

You get a women to do mans work and this is what happens Mark...

Just demote her and get her to make tea and generally tidy up and that...

 

WTF

 

[mention]Six30[/mention] is our new HR Manager.

[Slowlycatchymonkey]

Excellent I see a bright future for you

[Stu]

I think [mention]Six30[/mention] would be better with the mod gig and even that's pushing it!

[Guest]

Imagine a job interview with [mention]Six30[/mention]

[Six30]

Stop it ...I’m welling up here guys.

What’s the pay and company motor mark ?