Care homes

[Davidtav]

So I visited my mum in her care home today

 

And in the next room they were trying to motivate these old mainly ladies. And playing 60s music. And before I left some of them were trying to do the twist … you just know they were probably hot chicks in the 60s. I found it quite thought provoking actually if you understand. No joke getting old

 

There are a few men in there. Troubling that they don’t necessarily look a lot older than me. 
 

i honestly don’t want to get to that stage

[S-Westerly]

I know what you.mean. My dad is 92 and he's pretty fit for his age but my mum has been sedentary for the last 15 years and I'd hate to be like that. No life at all.

 

[manxie49]

I know well what you mean …. Worked in health for years after coming out of the Army and seen many thought provoking things.  It’s always best not to dwell to much on those thoughts, just live life and enjoy it

[Tiggie]

I want to be like my boss's Father. A couple of years ago he was helping my boss out renovating a flat he had bought as a rental. I went in the bedroom where he was working to find him on top of a stepladder reaching over to finish installing a light fitting.

 

He was 84 at the time 

[Mississippi Bullfrog]

Roger McGough....

 

Let me die a youngman's death
not a clean and inbetween
the sheets holywater death
not a famous-last-words
peaceful out of breath death

When I'm 73
and in constant good tumour
may I be mown down at dawn
by a bright red sports car
on my way home
from an allnight party

Or when I'm 91
with silver hair
and sitting in a barber's chair
may rival gangsters
with hamfisted tommyguns burst in
and give me a short back and insides

Or when I'm 104
and banned from the Cavern
may my mistress
catching me in bed with her daughter
and fearing for her son
cut me up into little pieces
and throw away every piece but one

Let me die a youngman's death
not a free from sin tiptoe in
candle wax and waning death
not a curtains drawn by angels borne
'what a nice way to go' death

[S-Westerly]

When I had my bike serviced recently the workshop owner told me that his oldest customer was 94 and had bought himself a Triumph  Bonneville as his birthday present to himself when he was 90. I was impressed.

[onesea]

 

My daughter is already under instruction if I get dementia to book me a track day...

My partner has already had to remind her to wait till I get dementia

 

As I hear too often "getting old is no fun".

[Mississippi Bullfrog]

Growing old is mandatory

 

Growing up is optional 

[Mickly]

Mrs Mickly used to work as a carer at a care home, I heard enough from her for us to make a pact that under no circumstances will either of us end up in one… as long as one of us has the mental capacity to understand what’s going on.

[onesea]

6 minutes ago, Mickly said:

Mrs Mickly used to work as a carer at a care home, I heard enough from her for us to make a pact that under no circumstances will either of us end up in one… as long as one of us has the mental capacity to understand what’s going on.

There are good ones IMHO.  Generally smaller scruffy ones ones, with good staff retention.  Larger ones become impersonal IMHO.

 

[Tiggie]

My Wifes Grandpa has carers that come in 3 times a day. They make him his meals, take him out if he wants to go somewhere etc.

 

My Wifes Mum (his daughter) was there the other day when a carer came. New girl, probably 19 or 20. She asked him what he'd like for his tea and he said sausage, egg and beans. Wife's Mum then observed the girl standing in the kitchen looking at the oven like she had never seen one before. She asked her if she wanted any help and she admitted she had no idea how to cook what he had asked for 

 

You would think a company hiring people to go and cook meals for the elderly would at the least make sure they actually could cook a simple meal! I can only assume everyone else she dealt with got sandwiches. 

[S-Westerly]

21 hours ago, Mickly said:

Mrs Mickly used to work as a carer at a care home, I heard enough from her for us to make a pact that under no circumstances will either of us end up in one… as long as one of us has the mental capacity to understand what’s going on.

My missus was a charge nurse at one and ditto. That said some are a lot better than others but you pay for the privilege and if you can't then your up the proverbial creek without a paddle, probably in a wire canoe.

[Gerontious]

Ive managed 7 months in this current care home and Ive had enough. Dementia is a terrible thing, it really is. Ive found it emotionally exhausting, with the bad times far outweighing the good.

So now Im in the midst of applying for and being interviewed for jobs back doing what I know best, supporting adults with severe learning difficulties and mental health issues. or Autism.

Its not just the lack of memory.. I got used to that very quickly. its the almost constant hallucinations some of these people have. plus the fear. the tears. and those truly awful moments where the person is rational to a level and has some awareness of what's happening to them and can talk about what they have lost before spiralling back into the fog. Im too soft for it.  And then there are the incident reports where a relative. wife, husband, child has come to visit and been attacked. or ignored. or the resident has reacted in total fear of this stranger and wanted out. plus there have been 3 deaths. all but one, people that I really liked

I can't stand it any more. Fortunately there's a huge shortage of experienced staff. so it won't be long.

Im just not made for dealing with dementia. its truly awful.

 

I should add that the place im working at specialises in people that 'normal' dementia care homes can't deal with.. so these are the worst.

 

We have recently had a new fella move in. 10 years younger than me with a syndrome that has dementia like symptoms caused by a vitamin deficiency as a result of alcoholism. self inflicted.

and  oh. my. god.

[S-Westerly]

My wife worked with a number of dementia patients and like you found them the most difficult of all "special needs" patients. 

[billy sugger]

When I was in hospital having my large bowel removed they put a guy with vascular dementia on our ward. He kept everyone awake at night with his constant shouting out, and worse, he did not speak a word of English so none of the nurses could get through to him 

[Mickly]

9 hours ago, billy sugger said:

When I was in hospital having my large bowel removed they put a guy with vascular dementia on our ward. He kept everyone awake at night with his constant shouting out, and worse, he did not speak a word of English so none of the nurses could get through to him 

I had a similar experience, the guy kept shouting & crying out for Michael which was a bit unsettling, but this wasn’t as bad as the guy in the next bed immobile & hooked up to Oxygen that was giving the nurses foul abuse because the wouldn’t wheel him outside so he could have a smoke