Guest Posted March 19, 2018 Posted March 19, 2018 My mate took his Grandad to one of those fancy Health Spa's, where tiny little fish eat all the dead skin.It cost him £35, but it was a lot cheaper than a funeral. OMG terrible lol Quote
MikeHorton Posted March 19, 2018 Posted March 19, 2018 They get worse.........Vehicle crime on multi storey car parks wrong on every level! Quote
Moonraker Posted March 20, 2018 Posted March 20, 2018 They get worse.........Vehicle crime on multi storey car parks wrong on every level! Like farting in a lift.... Quote
Moonraker Posted March 20, 2018 Posted March 20, 2018 Did you hear about the magic tractor that went down the road and turned in to a field? Quote
mikestrivens Posted March 20, 2018 Posted March 20, 2018 ...Like farting in a lift.... That's the equivalent of driving a diesel car. Quote
Mr Fro Posted March 20, 2018 Posted March 20, 2018 ..bykah grurve.. Still don't know which one's which. Quote
Six30 Posted March 20, 2018 Posted March 20, 2018 ..bykah grurve.. Still don't know which one's which. Deks the sober one Quote
geofferz Posted March 22, 2018 Posted March 22, 2018 [attachment=0]FB_IMG_1521743006451.jpg[/attachment]That's superb. I hope it's real. Edit: yep! http://www.turboanalisis.com Fantastic. Quote
onesea Posted March 26, 2018 Posted March 26, 2018 A distinguished young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, “Father, may I ask a favor?””Of course child. What may I do for you?”“Well, I bought an expensive woman’s electronic hair dryer for my Mother’s birthday that is unopened and well over the Customs limits, and I’m afraid they’ll confiscate it.Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?”“I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie.” “With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.” When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her.The official asked, “Father, do you have anything to declare?” “From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare.”The official thought this answer strange, so asked, “And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?” “I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused.”Roaring with laughter, the official said, “Go ahead, Father. Next!” Quote
Stu Posted March 26, 2018 Posted March 26, 2018 https://www.facebook.com/farminguk/videos/1523374967777594/ Quote
Guest Posted April 1, 2018 Posted April 1, 2018 If you've got nuts on your chest you've got chestnuts.If you've got nuts on the wall you've got walnuts.But what if you've got nuts on your chin?you've got a cock in your mouth. Quote
Guest Posted April 4, 2018 Posted April 4, 2018 I gave blood the other day, but instead of a biscuit they gave me a pitta bread and salad. It was a donor kebab. Quote
Mississippi Bullfrog Posted April 9, 2018 Posted April 9, 2018 What do you call a pig with four eyes?Piiiig Quote
SlowBusa Posted April 23, 2018 Posted April 23, 2018 [mention]Six30[/mention] Have you thought of Therapy ? Quote
Guest Posted April 23, 2018 Posted April 23, 2018 why do farts smell..for the benefit of the deaf.. Quote
BabyD Posted April 26, 2018 Posted April 26, 2018 Apple have shelved plans to release a iPad aimed at children.....The name Itouch kids was deemed unacceptable Quote
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