Popular Post Ian Frog Posted February 7, 2023 Popular Post Posted February 7, 2023 One especially for @Stu Cheers Ian 11 Quote
Tiggie Posted February 7, 2023 Posted February 7, 2023 Reminds me of the old only fools and horses bit. Del: Never give up on people, Rodney. I know that most of the time they don't seem to understand. But when you're in trouble and you cry out for help, some will always be there. Trigger's cousin Cyril's a perfect example. He owed 500 quid on his mortgage. Trigger: They were gonna be thrown out on the street the following day. he was very worried about it. Mike: So what happened Trig? Trigger: He drove out to Beachy Head. Parked about five foot from the edge of the cliff. Albert: What, he was gonna drive off it? Trigger: Yeah! He just sat there for a couple of hours, his head resting on the steering wheel. People tried to talk to him out of it but he was too depressed to listen. Del: But then, and this is what I mean about people, Rodney, they had a whip-round and got him his 500 quid. Rodney: No! Who held the whip-round? Del: All the passengers on his bus. 8 Quote
Tiggie Posted February 10, 2023 Posted February 10, 2023 I think I originally nicked this from here but I'm reposting anyway as for some reason it makes me laugh 1 8 Quote
Tiggie Posted February 18, 2023 Posted February 18, 2023 "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl." The priest asks, "Is that you, little Joey Pagano?" "Yes, Father, it is." "And who was the girl you were with?" "I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation." "Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?" "I cannot say." "Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?" "I'll never tell." "Was it Nina Capelli?" "I'm sorry, but I cannot name her." "Was it Cathy Piriano?" "My lips are sealed." "Was it Rosa DiAngelo, then?" "Please, Father! I cannot tell you." The priest sighs in frustration. "You're very tight lipped, and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 weeks. Now you go and behave yourself." Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and whispers, "What'd you get?" "Four weeks holiday and five good leads... 5 Quote
Tinkicker Posted February 18, 2023 Posted February 18, 2023 (edited) My mate just escaped from a travelling troupe of mime artists who had kidnapped him. He said they had subjected him to unspeakable things. Edited February 18, 2023 by Tinkicker 8 Quote
husoi Posted February 23, 2023 Posted February 23, 2023 Adam when having his first erection: Eve, You better back off. I have no idea where this is going... 3 Quote
daveinlim Posted February 28, 2023 Posted February 28, 2023 (edited) I think my tyre's going bald. Edited February 28, 2023 by daveinlim 1 5 1 Quote
fredc Posted March 1, 2023 Posted March 1, 2023 Two ducks go on their honeymoon and stay in a hotel. As they are about to make love, the male duck says, ”Oh, we haven’t got any cond0ms. I’ll ring down to room service.” He calls and asks for some cond0ms. The woman says ”OK sir, would you like to put them on your bill?” ”No” he says, ”I’ll suffocate!” 1 7 Quote
veracocha Posted March 13, 2023 Posted March 13, 2023 I went to see a faith healer last night. He was so shit the bloke in the wheelchair walked out. 6 1 Quote
Ian Frog Posted April 1, 2023 Posted April 1, 2023 "Winter’s done, and April’s in the skies. Earth, look up with laughter in your eyes!” ― Charles G.D. Roberts Here are some of our recent motorcycle news stories for you to enjoy, head over to Wemoto News and Facebook for more reads! April Motorcycle Events Champing at the bit to get out there, here are some of the things going on....More NEW PRODUCT JUST IN - HELMET PANNIERS Increase your carrying capacity without compromising your bike's style. Today's fast pace of life requires ergonomically designed helmet panniers, be the latest in trending. There are many safety features built into each pannier, such as a pull string detachment system........More 4 Quote
Grumpy Old Git Posted April 4, 2023 Posted April 4, 2023 I think they are sold out as 'not found' on the search 6 Quote
Steve_M Posted April 13, 2023 Posted April 13, 2023 I had a vasectomy because I didn't want to have kids, but when I got home they were still there..... 7 Quote
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