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Xmas presents


husoi
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Do you remember when socks were the worst Christmas present you could get?

 

This year I got a fecking Alexa... 😠😠😠😠

 

"Alexa, how long does it takes to swim from Southampton to New York?

"I don't know that."

 

Useless piece of sh@t.... 🙄

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7 minutes ago, Swagman said:

Sooner have socks.👍

Have a drawer full of them plus all the thermal socks for riding.

Just proper red wine or 18yr Glenfiddich will be enough :thumb: 

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15 minutes ago, husoi said:

Do you remember when socks were the worst Christmas present you could get?

 

This year I got a fecking Alexa... 😠😠😠😠

 

"Alexa, how long does it takes to swim from Southampton to New York?

"I don't know that."

 

Useless piece of sh@t.... 🙄

 

She will fart for you if you ask her 🤣

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14 minutes ago, husoi said:

Do you remember when socks were the worst Christmas present you could get?

 

This year I got a fecking Alexa... 😠😠😠😠

 

"Alexa, how long does it takes to swim from Southampton to New York?

"I don't know that."

 

Useless piece of sh@t.... 🙄

We got the mother in law one in the sales.

Comedy gold. She's 80 and from Batley!!!!

It can't understand her and she then proceeds to have lengthy one way arguments with it....

And i quote "stupid that woman"

 

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1 minute ago, dynax said:

 

She will fart for you if you ask her 🤣

I have the wife for that and don't even need to ask. 😋

Although Alexa is cheaper than keeping the wife and same amount of sex... 🙄🙄

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Guest Swagman
8 minutes ago, husoi said:

Have a drawer full of them plus all the thermal socks for riding.

Just proper red wine or 18yr Glenfiddich will be enough :thumb: 

That sounds good to me can you send me a crate full please.👍

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4 minutes ago, Swagman said:

That sounds good to me can you send me a crate full please.👍

Can't.

Don't have the address. :P 

And you have timeout 🤣

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35 minutes ago, husoi said:

 

"Alexa, how long does it takes to swim from Southampton to New York?

"I don't know that."

 

Useless piece of sh@t.... 🙄

3632 nautical miles at about 3 knots so about 50.4 days however the gulf stream will be against you. So you might be better to walk to Spain and swim to the Caribbean as the weather and currents are with you and it would be warmer...

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Guest Swagman
17 minutes ago, onesea said:

3632 nautical miles at about 3 knots so about 50.4 days however the gulf stream will be against you. So you might be better to walk to Spain and swim to the Caribbean as the weather and currents are with you and it would be warmer...

Thanks Alexa.🤣

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1 minute ago, Trooper74 said:

It's listening to everything you say ... day in , day out ....

That's not a problem for me.

I never interrupt the wife anway.

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Basically he just said "Alexa play fart song". And away she went.

 

I suggest discretion if trying it out as I was telling my son and when I said the magic words it started playing.  

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2 hours ago, Trooper74 said:

It's listening to everything you say ... day in , day out ....

Every time I go to my Stepdaughter’s place I sit next to Alexa and say stuff like Jihad, kill Trump, Murder Boris, death to technology, shoot the Police & other such bollox, even if it’s switched off .... the jokes wearing a bit thin now & Alexa may actually witness a murder committed by my DiL 🤣 

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Sit next to it and talk about sailing boat hire in the Maldives ... and within a few hours the adverts on your laptop or device will be for .... Sailing Boat Hire in the Maldives .... It's even worse if you have a Mac Book ... start talking about cycle hire in Nepal and within minutes the adverts appear ... It's a game my grandson and I play ....

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4 hours ago, onesea said:

3632 nautical miles at about 3 knots so about 50.4 days however the gulf stream will be against you. So you might be better to walk to Spain and swim to the Caribbean as the weather and currents are with you and it would be warmer...

There is no way people average 3 knots in the water. 

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5 hours ago, Mississippi Bullfrog said:

Our lot know better than to buy me anything electronic. It would be broken within seconds.

 

Just finished building one of my presents - loads more to do during a cold dismal lockdown

Grange House.jpg

 

No country village model is complete without....https://www.historicrail.com/The-Boobie-Hatch-Strip-Club-Kit-HO-Scale/productinfo/400653/

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6 hours ago, husoi said:

Do you remember when socks were the worst Christmas present you could get?

 

This year I got a fecking Alexa... 😠😠😠😠

 

"Alexa, how long does it takes to swim from Southampton to New York?

"I don't know that."

 

Useless piece of sh@t.... 🙄

nothing wrong with socks i got socks handy things :classic_smile:

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1 hour ago, skyrider said:

nothing wrong with socks i got socks handy things :classic_smile:

Well.. socks would be a footy thing isn't? 🤣🤣🤣🤣

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